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~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
EPnews -- from The Entrepreneurial Parent
a work-family resource for home-based entrepreneurs
@ http://www.en-parent.com

November 14, 2000

Lisa Roberts, Editor: epideas@en-parent.com
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_

Do you find EPnews useful?
Please forward to a friend, or recommend it to your favorite Web site or
e-zine. Thanks for your support!

---> Subscribe TODAY: EPnews-Subscribe@egroups.com <---

For easy reading, simply print out this newsletter.

_______________CONTENTS_______________

EP of the Month -- Craig Campana
EP Times -- "Election 2000 & King Kong Dreams"
EP Q&A's -- How to handle a 4-yo's anger
What's Happening at EP -- Deadline for EP Survey Approaches!
_________________________________________

Editorial Note: EPnews is distributed the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays of every
month, except during the summer. The Entrepreneurial Parent web site is
updated on an ongoing basis throughout each month (en-parent.com). Welcome
all new subscribers!

======================================================================

A D V E R T I S E M E N T

WomenEnt.com

Extraordinary women-owned websites who's entrepreneurial spirit makes them
stand out above the rest. Art clocks, healthcare and aromatherapy products,
web design services, jewelry, gift shops, tarot readings, rocking chairs,
garden gifts, unique collectibles and more. Ethical conduct, quality goods
and services and great customer service are our hallmark!

http://www.womenent.com

A D V E R T I S E M E N T
=====================================================================
=====================================================================

R E C O M M E N D A T I O N

The Practical Dreamer's Handbook
by Paul & Sarah Edwards (September, 2000)

Ever wonder how some people can make their dreams come true while others live
all their life long with just a pipe dream? In this eloquently-written book,
Sarah and Paul Edwards encourage their readers to "get practical" and make
their dreams come true, whatever they may be. This book is a jewel, and
clearly written from the heart. Enjoy!!

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1585420557/theentrepreneuri

R E C O M M E N D A T I O N
===================================================================
___________________________________
THE FUNNY THINGS EP KIDS SAY & DO!

Submitted by EPnews Subscriber, Rosanne Kupiec
(mailto:rkupiec@professionalva.com), who is the grandmother to 9 and is
helping us put together an "EP Grandparents Center" for our site. (If you're
a grandparent and would like to help her, please contact us at
"epideas@en-parent.com" -- thanks!!):

We were watching television and President Clinton was in the news. Gabriel,
our 2 1/2 year old grandson, broke out in song with "From the Halls of
Montezuma." He knew all the lyrics and was singing at the top of his lungs.
In our amazement, we asked how he knew that song. He said, "Poppy Pete taught
me." Poppy Pete is his great-grandfather, a proud WW II Marine Veteran, who
has told Gabriel about this great country of ours, and how lucky we are to be
American. However each of us feels about the current administration, the
simple truth from a child's point of view is that we do live in quite an
amazing country. I guess little Gabriel was paying attention to something
most of us take for granted!

=========

Why work at home? So you can hear the funny things your EP Kids say
throughout the day. Share with the EP Community something your child said or
did recently that made you smirk, giggle, or LOL. Send your submission via
e-mail to:epideas@en-parent.com.

And if you need a stockpile of smiles to get you through your EP day, check
out Grace Housholder's heartwarming "The Funny Kids Project" at
www.funnykids.com. On those stressed-out EP days, you'll be glad you did!

Grace's coffee table book is also available at:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0963871536/theentrepreneuri

___________________________________
EP OF THE MONTH

Craig Campana
http://en-parent.com/Profiles/Campana.htm

Every month we (try!) to highlight the achievements of one of our newly
registered members by selecting them as our "EP of the Month." As we review
our new member forms, we take a look at business names, niche markets,
special PR or advertising techniques, innovative products or services, and other types of unique business practices.

This month we chose Craig Campana, EP to 2 children, ages 9 and 6. His
company, Business Networking International - Wisconsin, at www.bniwis.com, is
a networking organization designed to help members increase their business
through a structured, positive, and professional "word-of-mouth" program. We
think they have a smart networking model where only one member from a certain
profession or industry joins each local chapter. We're very pleased to have
Craig as a new member of our EP Community.

<begin round of applause>

Please welcome Craig Campana by viewing his Profile Page at:
http://en-parent.com/Profiles/Campana.htm

and/or sending him a welcome message at:
mailto:referrals@bniwis.com

</end round of applause>

To All -- Please Note: We now hand out an "award" graphic to our EPs of the
Month, which can be prominently displayed on the winner's home page or "press
room" page. We also continue to offer our selected EPs a FREE Profile Page at
the EP Showcase and a photo link from our home page all month. So please
spread the word among your friends, colleagues and email loops -- invite the
EPs in your life to join en-parent.com as a registered member, and let's
build the EP Community together!

 

__________________________________
EP TIMES -- AN EDITORIAL

"Election 2000 & King Kong Dreams"
© 2000, Lisa M. Roberts

There are six days in my life that I will always remember. The day my husband
and I were married. Each of the days our four children were born. And
Election Day, 2000.

Last Tuesday, like any other Election Day, I was debating whether or not to
take my kids to their school's annual "Ice Skating Party" to pass their day
off. While skating around an ice rink with all their classmates may sound
like a blast, I knew it would be high stress for me trying to keep a close
eye on all three boys in a crowded, tight space. By noon, a much better idea
hit me...

I told everyone to pack the mini-van with whatever items they might want to
take on a day out -- sand toys; soccer, basketball and baseballs;
waterbottles and snacks; books, CDs and gameboys for the car trip -- but
wouldn't reveal where we were going. When the four of them had done all that,
piled into the car and were settled in their seat belts/car seats, I pulled
open the sliding door and gave a little speech. I explained that we lived in
a free country, and on Election Day every American of voting age has an
opportunity to have a say on who will be the leaders of our nation -- which "from sea to shining sea" was one of the most beautiful places in all the Earth. So to celebrate our freedom...and our right to vote...we were going on a family adventure to explore some place in our own state that we had never been before. Then I opened up a map of Connecticut, put it in the laps of William and Jessica who were seated next to each other, and asked them to pick any spot on the map that looked interesting as I drove over to the Post Office to pick up my business mail.

So began our trip to Mystic, Connecticut. For over two hours we drove in the
sun and through a winding road lined with red and golden trees in peaceful
anticipation of the day ahead. When we pulled into town we checked in at
Tourist Information to review our options. With little discussion, we decided
to stretch our legs and play with some of the kid stuff they had so carefully
packed at a small beach/playground called (rather appropriately!) "William's
Beach." After that, we spent the rest of the afternoon at the Mystic
Aquarium -- watching dolphins jump and dive, listening to land seals squawk,
and exploring the special "Challenge of the Deep" exhibit hosted by Dr.
Robert D. Ballard.

While all this was going on, I was acutely aware that the nation was electing
our next president and, like everyone else, really hadn't a clue who that
would be. All afternoon I resisted listening to the news radio to find out
what was happening, and by dinner time I finally spoke my mind out loud. Over
Friendly's ice cream, I told the kids, "Listen, I want you each to know
something. Right now, as we eat, the next President of the United States is
being elected. I want you to know that no matter who it is, everything is going to be just fine. We are going to be just fine." Of course, I was trying to convince myself more than anyone, but in all honesty I did watch a PBS special on the major candidates the night before and learned quite a bit more about each of them, and the lines of my loyalty blurred ever so slightly.

After dinner, I was hooked to the news reports for the rest of the night --
first on the car ride home and then on TV election coverage. Ron came home,
the kids got ready for bed, and we promised to wake Jessica and William as
soon as we heard anything definite, as they requested, no matter what time it
was. Then the midnight hour came and Ron and I drifted from the living room
to our bedroom, leaving the bedroom TV on as we hesitantly drifted into sleep.

The next thing I remember was hearing a soft knock on our door, and a little
head bopping through the room groggily mumbling about having a "King Kong
Dream." I never heard Thomas talk about King Kong before, but apparently the
big ape visited him in the middle of the night and knocked him right out of
his slumber -- right out of his bed and into ours. Now awake, I tuned into
Dan Rather's voice to hear whether our new President had been elected and was
shocked to find out how tight the race had played out, and how it was down to
one state now....Florida. I woke Ron up. We watched Dan Rather declare Bush
the next President Elect. We waited...for a long time...to hear Gore's
concession speech. And then the bells of history rang as Rather exclaimed in
disbelief, "It's cardiac arrest time in the presidential campaign!"

"Go wake Jessica up," I told Ron, wanting her to witness history taking
place. Jessica joined us within minutes. "You better wake William too," I
said, after my husband settled back under the sheets. He eagerly jumped up
and got William too. When I noticed that everyone was in the bed -- Ron, me,
Jessica, William and Thomas (fast asleep now) -- except Jimmy, I told Jessica
to get him too. For the next hour the whole family continued to "celebrate
Election Day" right in our bed -- with laughter, curiosity, disbelief and
wonder. Questions poured out of the kids and Ron's eyes were sparkling with
the excitement all around. I had a "V8 Moment" when I realized the story line
felt very familiar -- in fact, it was written long ago by Dr. Seuss! Gore and
the Democratic Party had decided to embark on a quest to make sure every Who
in Whoville (no matter how small) had had their voices heard (was ANYBODY
shirking??). The kids grasped onto the Whoville concept instantly and a new
wave of conversation, commentary and questions came over us all.

Now, a week later, all the Who's in Whoville are up in arms. The "All
Recount, All the Time" news coverage has the nation talking emphatically, one
way or another. The kids -- at least mine -- have long moved on with the rest
of *their* lives, while the adults -- at least in this house -- are still
tuned in nightly. But what I told the kids over ice cream that night still
stands. No matter who wins the election, I know more than ever before that
we, the American people, will be just fine. In fact in my eyes, the "winner"
has already been elected -- for the winner is our country's forefathers, who
wrote the Constitution and had the foresight to design the Electoral College
system -- and the American people, who passionately fight out our differences
with words and laws instead of tanks and guns. As this national drama
unfolds, day after night after day, the final victor of this election is
growing less and less relevant. The people, and our legal system of checks
and balances, have won, hands down.

Not since Election Night has Thomas been pushed out of his bed and into ours
with a bad dream. I can't help but wonder if it was really King Kong waking
him up that night, or a very big angel with broad shoulders and strong arms.
But I'm convinced whoever it was knew exactly what was happening in Florida.
For he couldn't have chosen a better moment to send Thomas to us, so we as a
family could cap an Election Day so rich in family -- and national -- lore.

=========What were *you* doing on Election Day, 2000? Let's hear it. Email
"editor@en-parent.com" and we may share your thoughts and experiences in our
next EPnews issue.

=========

Lisa Roberts is the mother of four, Site Producer of The Entrepreneurial
Parent and author of "How to Raise A Family & A Career Under One Roof: A
Parent's Guide to Home Business" (Bookhaven Press, 1997). "EP Times" is a
continuation of the "Home Business Diary" essays originally created for her
book, which is available for purchase at:
http://en-parent.com/order.htm and through Amazon, at:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0943641179/theentrepreneuri

____________________________________
EP Q&As

Have a question? Our EP Expert Panel is available to all EPnews Subscribers.
Visit them at http://en-parent.com/experts.com (follow the "Q&A" links). If
your question isn't answered there, then send it to: experts@en-parent.com.
They'll be glad to help you out if they can!

Q. Dear Jodie,

We only have one son, and he is the greatest birth control there is. From
the moment he was born, he has been a very "spirited child." Very high to
maintain and whines about everything. The past six months has been very
rocky for my husband and I. I thought I understood my son's anger
(demonstrates it very often and very clearly). I attributed his outburst to
the animosity between my husband and myself. However, my husband and I have
seeked counseling and our relationship has been restored (obviously we have a
ways to go, but we're a hundred times better). My son's behavior has
worsened since the positive change in our home. He attends daycare and has
since he was one year old. The "unhappy" remarks from his teacher grow each
day. At home, he fusses about everything and has one temper tantrum after
another. Could his behavior stem from his father and I getting closer and
perhaps he no longer feels the center of attention? I truly don't think that
the quality of our time has weakened (except for the increase of tantrums).
Any advice or help you could send my way would be so appreciated, I feel like
I'm failing my son. Thank you very much.

Sincerely,
Melissa Baikauskas

Dear Melissa:

Wait! Someone else could very well be attributing to your son's behavior!
I'm going to be abrupt here -- as this is a very common but serious
challenge. He is acting the way the daycare expects him to behave and
carrying it over to home. Woe to all, the teachers and child care providers
probably have already "branded and labeled" him as a troublemaker and very
much a "handful." Once this happens, he accepts this title and demonstrates
everything he can to live up to it. Why not? It is what they expect on a
daily basis.

You might need to consider switching facilities. It's basically the same
thing that happens in school. Once the child becomes a challenge for a
teacher, she writes it in his file. Many times, that just about does it for
his future. (Each teacher has a presumed mental attitude for him before the
school year begins.) :(

I try to emphasize to parents to not label children -- even when they're
"good." It is all in my book, "Mommy-CEO," and to be honest, I could write
another whole book on this very topic. When your son is doing what you'd
like and acting the way you want, be sure to let him know. Put yourself in
his shoes: He simply doesn't know how to act differently than what his
environment has thrown his way up to now. In fact, he is probably not too
sure you and your husband have really stopped having difficulties. This is
also making him uncomfortable.

Tell and show him when he is displaying "acceptable" behavior followed with a
sincere hug and pat on the back. And, if he accepts kisses, lay one on him!
Do not use the words: good or bad! It's "acceptable" behavior or "not
acceptable." He is probably mixed up and doesn't figure anyone will treat
him any differently than before -- so the old ways feel more comfortable.
(And, yes, even if it gets him into trouble.) Even his buddies at school
expect him to act like himself.

You and your husband will discover a new child by taking turns going out on a
date with your son one at a time. One on one attention does a lot to tear
down labels and walls. It will build up self-esteem and happy memories. It
doesn't have to be something spectacular and expensive. If it's too
elaborate -- you'll only be adding noise and confusion to the situation. Get
to know him by going to the zoo, story time on Saturdays, flying a kite,
having a picnic in a park and playing on the playground together. Keep it
simple and don't force conversation.

If you and your hubby have anything negative to say to each other -- keep it
distant from little ears -- and hearts. Remember, don't talk about him to
your husband in front of him -- all kids hate this (as you and I did when it
was done to us). Last but not least, don't be reserved in setting guidelines
and following through with consequences if not met. I don't mean spankings
but, time out, no TV, computer, play dates, etc. Set up household rules and
expectations inside and outside the home for acceptable behavior. It will
take time and patience to break old habits -- but well worth it in the end.
Best of luck!

Jodie Lynn, Mommy-CEO and chief bottle washer!
=======

Jodie Lynn is a nationally syndicated parenting columnist and author of
Parent to Parent & Other Stuff. Her latest book, Mommy - CEO (Constantly
Evaluating Others), Five Golden Rules will show you how to have a successful
family team and keep your wits for humor as well. For more advice from and
info on Jodie, visit her web site at: www.parenttoparent.com or her EP Expert
page at: http://en-parent.com/Experts/exp-lynn.htm

__________________________
WHAT'S HAPPENING AT EP

---> Deadline for EP Survey Approaches!

Thursday, November 30, 2000 -- the deadline for accepting survey responses
for "The National Survey of Entrepreneurial Parents" -- is fast-approaching!
If you haven't done so already, fill out our questionnaire today.

The short story:

http://en-parent.com/survey.htm

OR email "survey@en-parent.com" to receive the questionnaire by email.

The details (and please feel free to copy & paste the following & use as
needed with your email loops and ezine subscribers):

PUBLICITY OPPORTUNITY FOR ENTREPRENEURIAL PARENTS
If you work at home and are also in the throes of parenthood, we have a
publicity opportunity for you! Paul and Sarah Edwards, best-selling authors,
columnists and speakers on new and better ways to live and work, have teamed
up with the founder of en-parent.com, Lisa Roberts, to write "The
Entrepreneurial Parent: How to Earn Your Living at Home in the Internet Age
and Still Enjoy Your Family, Your Life and Your Work," to be published by
Tarcher/Putnam in 2002. They are currently conducting research for their book
and are looking for parents -- Dads, Moms and Parenting Couples -- who are
juggling working at home with parenting issues.

If that's you, stand up and be counted! Just email <survey@en-parent.com> to
receive a full questionnaire by email, or go to:
<http://en-parent.com/survey.htm> to take their "Short" and "Extended"
surveys online.

All survey respondents will be immediately eligible for the two "Survey
Prize" drawings, to be held in early December.

FIRST PRIZE: A Bundle of Books by Paul & Sarah Edwards, including:

** Working from Home: Everything You Need to Know About Living and Working
Under the Same Roof (1999)
** Making Money in Cyberspace (1998)
** Getting Business to Come to You: A Complete Do-It-Yourself Guide to
Attracting All the Business You Can Enjoy (1998)
** Teaming Up: The Small Business Guide to Collaborating With Others to Boost
Your Earnings and Expand Your Horizons (1997)
** Finding Your Perfect Work: The New Career Guide to Making a Living,
Creating a Life (1996)

SECOND PRIZE: A $100 EP Gift Basket, filled with:

** Items from the "EP Gift Shop," a specialty online gift shop stocked with
unique and original inventory created and/or designed by parents who work at
home

The Survey will run from September 1 - November 30, 2000, so if you're an
"EP," stand up and be counted today!

Good luck to all!

_____________________________
CONTACT/SUBSCRIPTION INFO

The Entrepreneurial Parent, LLC is not engaged in rendering legal or
financial advice. If expert assistance is required, the services of a
licensed professional should be sought.

This newsletter may be redistributed freely via the Internet. Re-publishing
of separate articles for your print publication needs approval first; write
to: Roberts@en-parent.com for permission.

© 2000, The Entrepreneurial Parent, LLC
Editor: Lisa M. Roberts
POB 320722, Fairfield, CT 06432; http://en-parent.com
Ph/Fax: (203) 371-6212, Email: office@en-parent.com

Community email addresses:
Subscribe: EPnews-subscribe@onelist.com
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List owner: EPnews-owner@onelist.com

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